For example, this blog.
Normally it was mean to be used for a kind of poetry…
Or I thought so.
As then, I had just discover the pleasure of a certain lightness.
Now, I realise the true me is a mixture of everything.
Such a mixture.
But it comes perhaps because the constant in my life is:
My unquenchable attraction for challenges.
Not always knowing what I am doing to myself.
However, far more than many imagine.
Just in opposition is also a kind of desire to control things.
And in the middle of it, once in a while, I have bouts of laziness.
Right now, I accept that Internet life has something of a roller-caster.
Or that it moves in a fast lane.
I feel depth and shallowness and it keeps on revolving…
What seems deep turns to be shallow and the reverse happens too.
Is it because I am not yet used enough to it?
I hope so.
I have to give myself some more time to see:
Which part of me is going to voice itself in the strongest way?
Or have I not to make a choice there?
More concrete facts now.
I have grow found of my French site, there is loveliness, tenderness.
Some depths here and there and a lot of humour too.
While I am tempted to shut down the English-spoken one.
There is such a repetitious copy-past of pre-written well-wishes
And glitters, and cheap erotic pictures…
People, I know, they too, are mixed.
People who seem gross are not, but why all that vulgarity?
Then someone asked for friendship and I couldn’t refuse.
Just was unable.
So, my Inner voice said: “Keep it.
Don’t loose energy on it if you don’t feel it, but let it happens.
Imagine it like a crossroads for some people.
So, let it be.”
And that was it.
Today, the Voice said:
“After all, the people you care the more for like Teresa or Dustin,
They are not forever on it either…”
And that was definitely it.
Then, it is also what I do with “my” musicians.
I let it happen there also.
With some, we are staying in contact: I do, they do.
Talesha, Michael , Joelle and Phillip are the most faithful.
Then Paddy Reilly would write and it comes: that feeling of marvel….
At the other site, it is a funny mixture of yahoo friends and musicians.
Except for Lamin. And Yannick, the sister of Joelle.
But honestly, I am not exactly excited about it!
But where I feel a bit sad is about Filochon and Fili Green-Eyes.
And Flynn Conor.
Then of course, if I keep on helping Damsels in distress,
Where can I find time to write?
And this could be it in a nutshell…
However, the main thing in my life is that I met someone.
And for the very first time I feel like asking him for advices.
I feel I would like to share deep thoughts as well as jokes.
And all the in between.
As I feel like to bundle forces for whatever we can share, in fact.
Because I admire his indomitable spirit.
I suppose he would argue about this.
It is part of his charm.
He never seems to agree with me.
He would argue to have the last word.
Of course:
He is the Lover of words!
To myself.
